{"id":233,"date":"2009-03-11T13:22:05","date_gmt":"2009-03-11T18:22:05","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.bgpublishing.com\/bgp\/?p=233"},"modified":"2009-03-20T13:26:22","modified_gmt":"2009-03-20T18:26:22","slug":"pickled-crab","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bgpublishing.com\/bgp\/pickled-crab\/","title":{"rendered":"The Pickled Crab"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>One time back in the day, my girlfriend and I were out spending time together. On a whim we decided to stop in at a Korean Restaurant. Neither of us had ever been to a Korean spot before. The fact that it was also outfitted with a Japanese Sushi bar should have been a hint but, nevertheless, we were feeling adventurous and happy to be there. <\/p>\n<p>As each of us read our menus I recall her saying something to the effect of &#8220;Mmmmmm.. This crab dish sounds good,&#8221; along with mentioning &#8220;I like pickles&#8221;. I gave a nod, not really giving any thought to what she said. I was too immersed in the menu, reading and re-reading everything. I don&#8217;t eat pork and it seemed like every time an entree caught my eye when I checked it out again there was some form of pork hiding out in the dish. Feeling more hungry than adventurous, I finally just settled on ordering a Korean version of Shrimp-Fried Rice. She ordered one of the most expensive things on the menu, a dish that I couldn&#8217;t even begin to pronounce. After repeating the orders with a thick accent, the waitress looked at my girlfriend curious respect and said &#8220;Most &#8216;merican don oda dot.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>When our meals arrived, she received a platter with what looked like three huge bright red crabs garnished with some kind of deep green leafy vegetable. Along with that there were a few other salad plates, each with an unfamiliar type of vegetable. My order was just a big plate of Shrimp Fried Rice. I picked up my chopsticks and started eating. She made a wisecrack about my whimping out, hoping that I enjoyed my &#8220;boring little plate of rice&#8221;. About a minute after we started eating she managed to get my attention by mumbling something with her hands holding half of one of the crabs in her mouth.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;What&#8217;s wrong?&#8221; I asked.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Huuhkuuhisruuh&#8221; she tried to whisper, never taking the crab out of her mouth.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Huh what?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Huuhkuuhisruuhhhhh&#8230;&#8221; her eyes got wider as she repeated herself several times.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;What the&#8230; take the crab out of your mouth.&#8221; <\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Ikann.&#8221; she replied. I understood that she meant &#8220;I can&#8217;t&#8221;. <\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Why not?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Her eyes darted between me, her platter and looking around to see if anyone else was watching. &#8220;HUUHKUUH-ISSS-RUUHHHH!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>I picked up the other half of the broken crab; it was cold and slimey to the touch. Upon closer inspection I understood what she was saying. &#8220;Oh Damn, The Crab is RAW!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>She nodded wildly, too embarrassed to spit it out in front of me. The waitress appeared out of nowhere as if she had been watching the whole time. &#8220;Iz evting okay?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Ma&#8217;am, what&#8217;s up with this? Why are they raw?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>She pointed at the menu beneath the entree name. &#8220;It seh Pickled Crab. Zhe oda Pickled Crab.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>I nodded, trying not to laugh. The waitress handed my girlfriend a stack of napkins so big she could have spit out a whole Whopper without it being seen.<\/p>\n<p>Slightly embarrassed and annoyed, my girlfriend grumbled about the experience as I sat happily eating my boring little plate of rice. Finally I said something that seemed to put it all into perspective. &#8220;Yeah, you like crabs, and you like pickles, but sometimes Pickled Crab means PICKLED CRAB.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>And the moral of the story: Don&#8217;t make more out of something than it really is. Sometimes pickled crab <i>really means Pickled Crab.<\/i><\/p>\n<p>&#8212; Max Nomad<\/p>\n<p>[#####]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>One time back in the day, my girlfriend and I were out spending time together. On a whim we decided to stop in at a Korean Restaurant. Neither of us had ever been to a Korean spot before. The fact that it was also outfitted with a Japanese Sushi bar should have been a hint [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":""},"categories":[27],"tags":[29,30,28],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bgpublishing.com\/bgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/233"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bgpublishing.com\/bgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bgpublishing.com\/bgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bgpublishing.com\/bgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bgpublishing.com\/bgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=233"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.bgpublishing.com\/bgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/233\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":237,"href":"https:\/\/www.bgpublishing.com\/bgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/233\/revisions\/237"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bgpublishing.com\/bgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=233"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bgpublishing.com\/bgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=233"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bgpublishing.com\/bgp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=233"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}